An abridged excerpt from H & Job
https://poje.biz/products-overview/h-job/
The Village Idiot entered the office area of Corporation H from the far parking lot. It was more convenient coming in this way. His department’s cubicles were at the end of the building a long way from the rest of the accounting and finance department. It was 8 AM again. The return to the office came after another long night of work the previous night.
To his right The Village Idiot passed a building wall. Passing on his left stood the high walled Human Resource Department. It was no coincidence the HR walls were erected by the alternate doorway to the offices. The location facilitated sneaking people in and out of the area. The Village Idiot mentally saw a sign hanging over the entrance into the Great Wall of Company H reading Games People Play because that seemed to him to be the purpose of what went on inside much of time. It wasn’t the Forbidden City the Great Wall protected. It was the Foreboding City.
A few steps beyond on his right lay a walkway to the far factory doors to the machine shop area. The machine shop was a different part of the factory from the assembly lines of the factory. This area was where big spools of wires were placed on the big sewing machine which spun the wires together to create the cores used as the centers of push-pull cables. The cores wound onto bigger spools which were eventually moved to the extruders to extrude a variety of different coverings for the cores creating cables used as the basis for all sorts cables such as transmission cables or brake cables or the corn \ cotton picking cables.
In front of the Village Idiot was Dilbertville. A center aisle was formed by the cubicles of the office staff. The Village Idiot looked around to see who was already hard at work.
To the Village Idiot’s left ran a long stretch of four-foot-high cubicle wall that housed both Domestic and International Purchasing. The Purchasing wall housed two cubicles part of the center aisle cubicle wall. Three desk areas cubed against the building wall where the lucky ones had windows. Toshio sat across the road from The Village Idiot. He was there when The Village Idiot left the night before and he was seemingly still there dutifully communicating with Japan.
Ralphie toiled away in the cube next to Toshio. Against the wall Swirl Sister was hard at it. Next to her sat Bobby Crisis. Next to Bobby was the as yet unoccupied seat of The Hamster.
The wall was broken by an entrance framed into the Purchasing area. The frame was created by the walls of the Specialty Cable Group cubicles. SCG walls created a block C formation. Two desks were against the SCG Wall. Two desks faced the Purchasing area and three more desks ran along the building wall. Uncle Paul, the Thomas Twins, some Kenji’s, Mr. Mapes and Pam all occupied the zone.
Back across the aisle sat The Schnozz. He was the observant head of SCG Engineering always keeping an active set of eyes out like Gru watching over his Minions.
In between The Schnozz and where The Village Idiot shared a cubicle with GLOTU…The Ginkerloba of the Universe…lay the dual cube of Dino the Doggie Killer and SPOTU….The Suck Pig of the Universe. Dino was the Senior Product Estimator. SPOTU had worked his way off the factory floor to first become a Trainer to now being the Labor Estimator. They reported to The Village Idiot.
The Village Idiot entered his cube. He slung his man purse carrying items such as oranges and CDs to listen to while at work onto his. He started the PC boot-up process and started his morning office boot-up process of saying hello to everyone. His loud mouth boomed out a smiling series of “Morning Toshio! Morning Swirl! Morning Ralphie!” and so on. Heads barely moved from monitors reading the overnight e-mails replied a variety of things like Toshio’s standard “Morning Idiot-san” and the like. The heads may not have moved but lips betrayed enjoyment with the morning banter.
“Morning SPOTU” VI said while pulling out six CDs to add to the CD rack on his table. Being located far enough away from the rest of the Company H world did have the benefit of being able to listen to music much of the day at work. The thick wooden base rack had a metal frame and inserted metal slots creating room for nineteen discs. After filling the rack five slots were empty so fourteen CDs were in the office that day but which one to listen to first?
The Village Idiot looked at the computer time. It read 8:04. Eight times four equals thirty-two. He had fourteen CDs so fourteen times two equals twenty-eight and thirty-two less twenty-eight equals four so disc number four was the first choice of the day. The random choice landed on McCoy Tyner’s Infinity. It was a fine way to start the day and Toshio had an appreciation for jazz so this could be played a bit louder on the small ghetto blaster on the desk.
SPOTU finished the e-mail he was working on and stood up to lean on the wall to talk. “Morning Idiot-man” he answered. “Stay late last night?”
The play button was activated. “Not too bad” VI replied. “Only til about seven. I was able to catch Mr. Green Jeans for a couple of games of racquetball so that wasn’t too bad.” He looked at the piles of papers of various government regulatory reporting that needed filling out and cost estimates that needed reviewing and approving and signing off on and other documents and e-mails that needed addressing. “I finally got my emails cleaned up again so hopefully I can make a dent in some of this stuff.”
“I see you got a new Pez for the collection” SPOTU offered. “That makes five of them now. Where’d Daisy come from?”
The Village Idiot smilingly looked at the five Pez machines taped to the top of his cube wall. The first Pez machines erected were the Valentines Day Pezzes. One was a solid red heart with lettering that read Happy Valentine’s Day. The second Pez was a cute bear with blushing hearts cheeks. After Valentine’s Day came Easter and the two Easter Pezzes. One Pez was a baby chick wearing a red hat sitting in a half egg shell on a powder blue stand. The second Easter Pez was a white Easter Bunny tinged with pink on a pink stand. Now Daisy Duck was a member of the cartel.
“Mr. Honda dropped Daisy off last night on his way out of town” explained The Village Idiot. He turned wryly looked at SPOTU. “And you thought I worked late! He had to drive down to Marysville last night after he left.”
Looking at SPOTU drew The Village Idiot’s eyes to the empty GLOTU chair. Then the eyes looked at the Dale Earnhardt calendar’s that hung up on the wall. The eyes then turned right to the five-foot-tall Jeff Gordon Pepsi advertising cut-out that stood in the shared cubicle. The eyes then moved to looking at SPOTU’s eyes while the head shook. “Looks like Jeff stays up another week” he sighed.
“At least she made it to Wednesday this week” SPOTU rationalized. “That’s like a record, isn’t it?”
“Sure as heck seems like it is!” VI answered. He looked at a clock and then at Dino’s dark computer monitor and then at SPOTU. A look of curiosity covered his face. “Dino not around?”
“Wasn’t here when I got here” SPOTU answered. He thought a second. “She we start a rumor?” he asked.
“Which rumor would that be?” The Village Idiot asked back. “That Dino caught Ginkerloba disease? Or that…ahem…that Dino caught Ginkerloba disease!”
SPOTU shrugged his shoulders. “Either one works for me. We can get Swirl to help. That oughtta make it spread fast. We can…”
A commotion down the hall interrupted SPOTU’s train of thought. An impromptu one-person parade presented itself. All office eyes watched as Dino came walking down the hall carrying his float. The float consisted of a wooden frame with plastic stapled to the frame. Dino carried a Salad Bar.